Overwhelmed

...is how I have felt the last few days. I have stopped writing as much because I don't want to use this space to simply complain for the sake of complaining.

Some, OK all of my IBS issues have come back full force since the weekend. When combined with this pregnancy and 12 hr shifts, it is just disastrous. Sadly my meds to treat it are a class C. *sigh* I am back on board with what I can do-- fiber, pro-biotics, hydration, etc. but unfortunately those were never enough for my case before.
I am *hoping* it is just stress. I have an upcoming deadline at work for a big application for our unit to apply for the AACN Beacon Award. (It is kind of like magnet status for hospitals but for our unit specifically). I am SO glad that I have a deadline to get it done before maternity leave however, and co-worker and friend Jenn is writing half of it with me.
John, Carly, and I have an upcoming vacation which will be WONDERFUL once we are on it, but packing for trips and getting the pets set up with caretakers/for travel always stresses me out.

Today I was listening to my new Audrey Assad CD (amazing newly recorded Christian and CATHOLIC artist-buy her CD on iTunes!) and got very inspired by one of her songs:

Pain is a forest we all get lost in
Between the branches hope can be so hard to see
And In the darkness, we’ve all got questions
We’re all just trying to make sense out of suffering, but …

You say I am blessed because of this
So, I choose to believe
As I carry this cross
You’ll carry me (Help me believe it)

Fear is a current we all get caught in
And in its motion faith can be so hard to find
And we all falter, ‘cause we’re all broken
We’re all just trying to turn the shadows into light, but …

You get glory in the midst of this
And You’re walking with me, and …

I know Your promises are faithful
And God, I’ve seen Your goodness in my life
And oh, I’ve found Your mercy is a river
Your love is an ocean wide

You carry me God
You carry me

I have been suffering but there is hope in knowing I am blessed by this. I felt so much despair this weekend at the thought of entering my 3rd trimester, and being pregnant for 3 more months, but I know I will get though it, and I will just have to ask God to carry me. My eye is on the prize, can NOT WAIT to meet this baby girl and have her be free from the womb!!

He has already come through. Turns out I have to cut to part time as early as October, and we were looking at a financial crunch because of it. John just got the news yesterday that he is getting a performance bonus and raise, starting almost immediately. I am so proud of him and so happy to be reminded that the Lord will provide when you are doing His will. Amen for that and for providing husbands who work hard.

For now, my thoughts are on the beach that I will see come Monday!! before that, this weekend we will be a part of the house band for the Richmond Diocesan Youth Convention! Looking forward to seeing so many Catholic teens and praying they have a good experience, especially that they would come to know the Lord in a closer way during our adoration night.

Have a great week!